Nymph Interlewd
by WatUCWatIC
Summary: Nymphs are nudists and gossips. Voltron would like to keep them on their side. Diplomacy may as well be Lance's middle name, he's got this. Ah, but Nymphs and Lance are naturally flirty. If opposites attracts it only makes sense that alike mythos would repel, right? Nah. It goes surprisingly well.


**The Laith has taken over. You cannot stop it.**

**Naiads are nymphs that can be found in freshwater; places like rivers, streams, even fountains. They were regarded and revered by human villages and can still be found in some oversea landmarks, so I imagine them to be friendly to travelers. Their dances enthused me, and their beauty enthralled. Since they are nudist, I decided to make it a weapon of sorts.**

**Of course, if you get on their bad side, they'll show you a real weapon. They are the source of all chaos in nature, after all. Why do you think villages revered them so?**

**1**

Nymphs were nudists.

The humans looked away, embarrassed out of their minds. Hunk blushed and only happened to look at Lance to see him moving forward.

"Uh, what are you doing?"

"Lance," Keith growled when he noticed too. The selkie ignored them.

"He's flirting, isn't he?" Pidge asked, still covering her eyes with both hands.

"Why aren't _you _going there? Pidge, you're a girl too!"

"That doesn't mean I like to stare at other naked women!"

Shiro cleared his throat uncomfortably. "We do have to speak with them though."

Lance bowed before the nude women, who displayed themselves lavishly on the rocks of the stream. "My ladies," he greeted.

"A boy," they whispered to each other, approaching him with touchy hands.

"Are they dangerous?" Keith asked, already reaching for his bayard.

"No," Shiro shook his head. "Coran said they may be the most neutral ground we'll find. They don't care about the rest of the world, only their stream."

"Boy," the nymphs finally decided on a single speaker. "You."

"Indeed," Lance grinned, taking her hand in his. He had to look up at her as she stood on a stone, leveling her eyes just above his.

"But you do not fall," she mused, touching his chin and tilting it forward. He looked her in the eyes and smirked. She was a pretty girl, but he knew where to look. He held her eyes to his.

"Right again," he appraised her illation. Nymphs liked flattery, even when they knew it was fake. He was doing his best to not spout lies, however.

"I see," she smiled and turned to her sisters. "He's the same. They fall for him too."

The nymphs gathered around Lance, searching him for the reason. They caressed his arms, his back, his abdomen. Most searched his torso (and his ears, of course) rather than his face.

"It's the eyes," he provided the answer for them. His eyes worked just like their bodies. They didn't even have to dance like they did. The women grabbed his face and brought it close, to take a better look at his selkie eyes.

"I see," they repeated. "I see. Selkie, but far from the saltwater." They were careful to keep their hands away from his waist after that, which Lance appreciated. His coat remained untouched for the rest of the talk. He gave them his best smile for that.

"And teeth," one of them said, smiling back. Yeah, those sometimes got them too.

"Thank you," he said.

"We didn't come here to flirt, Lance," Keith grumbled behind them, tapping his foot impatiently. His hand no longer twitched toward his bayard, but there was still something aggressive about him. Then again, there was always something aggressive about Keith.

"It's called diplomacy, sourface," Lance stuck his tongue out at him.

Of course, the speaker nymph didn't _really _care for diplomacy. She grabbed his face again, forcing him to face her. "You and I, we are the same," she said.

"I've gotten too used to clothes, my lady. I don't think we are," he flirted, leaning in.

"Our children," she continued. "Our children would be better."

His smile fell.

"Are you propositioning me?" he asked, taking a step back. He winced immediately, watching her frown at the newfound distance between them.

"That's it," Keith stomped forward, but Shiro grabbed him before he could get far. "They're not going to accept unless he sleeps with her! We shouldn't even try to discuss with them!" Keith hissed.

"We don't know that," Shiro said. "They're coaxing each other. We have to observe the situation, Keith. They're possible allies."

Keith huffed and turned away, keeping an eye on Lance and the nymph.

"Sorry, my lady," Lance's easy grin replaced his shocked expression, "but I don't plan to leave the ocean again. Not for long. I will not stay."

The nymph scowled but tried for a compromise. "No need to stay," she said. "We can take care of children."

He shook his head. "I would not leave my children without a father." He looked her in the eyes. "And you wouldn't leave your stream. You understand, right?"

The nymph frowned. She leaned in, looking him in the eyes to read beyond them. Her nose touched his, but he didn't move back. Not a second time. That would have been a rude gesture to her beauty.

"Fine, brother," she said breathily, her lips almost on his.

"Brother?" Hunk and Pidge grimaced at the word. Keith glared daggers at the nymph, past his embarrassment and untouched by her body's magic.

"What is your request?" She asked him coolly, turning away from him to lay on the rocks with her sisters again. Her hips swayed with every step, dancing with the elegance of a slow river.

Though her loss of interest in the uninterested teen discouraged the rest of the crew of a possible alliance, Lance brightened at the word "brother." Nymphs didn't accept brothers so easily. They barely even accepted sisters aside from those born from them.

They were willing to call him family. _Selkie eyes for the win!_ These talks were going to go well.

**2**

"I can't believe that worked," Hunk exclaimed when they reached their dolphins again.

"You doubted me? For shame, Hunk," Lance grinned at the screen. "For shame."

"I thought the deal was off the second you turned her down. What was up with the whole children thing anyway?" Pidge asked, taking off her helmet and fixing her glasses. "And why were they naked?"

"And the brother thing!" Hunk raised his voice. "That was creepy!"

"That was a good thing," Lance taught. "The brother thing was a _very_ good thing. It meant that they accepted me as their own, even though I said no to siring a child with her! That was amazing!"

"What was so amazing about it?" Keith grumbled. "This mission was useless. What's the point of having nymphs join us if they won't fight? All they do is sleep on rocks all day."

"Keith," Shiro said unfavorably. "They speak with travelers. They are very good sources of information. These Naiads are only the beginning of the information channel."

"Heh," Lance chuckled. "Channel. Get it? Channel of water? Straits? Rivers?" They didn't seem very amused. "No?"

Not one to leave his brother alone, Hunk gave him his best laugh, though it sounded rather faked. Lance's smirk turned upside-down and he spoke again, ignoring the lack of response.

"Shiro's right. Nymphs know _everything_. They're the biggest gossips, you only need ask. If we want info, we can ask them. If we want to keep something hidden...well, now, we can also just ask.

"They're pretty little liars, so they shouldn't be in danger for it as long as we don't mess up. Even the Galra shouldn't want to screw with them, though." He muttered the last part to himself.

"Keith thought you'd have to sleep with one," Pidge provided.

"I didn't!"

"It's not past them," Lance said pensively. "I thought I'd end up having to go back to beg her. I wouldn't sleep with one though. Or, at least, I wouldn't want to have a kid with a river nymph."

Shiro would never understand sleeping with someone for the fun of it. It was such an intimate act, after all. Pidge didn't understand it period. Ah, but she was young. Maybe one day? Lance thought not.

It was Hunk who asked, "Then who would you want children with?"

Lance's face was a little warm. "Most selkies just marry other selkies. I used to think I would too, but maybe I don't want to. We are pretty adventurous, you know? Generations of selkies have traveled the oversea and the undersea with the intent to never go back to a home, and many have succeeded in it. I had a lot of relatives in the oversea," he ended in a mumble. All of them were gone now.

"You don't seem like the type to want to travel forever though," Hunk said. Although Lance was trying his hardest to give him a look that meant "SHUT UP," it wasn't working. "Now that I think about it, you were always looking for the closest beach, even when I thought you were afraid of water."

"You always wanted to go back home," Shiro deduced quietly, giving Lance one of his soft looks.

"I just wanted my skin," Lance said with a cool voice to balance it out. "And my family. I got what I can, can we _not_ do this?" He clenched his hand around the skin that was tied around his waist like a jacket. (He was never letting it go ever again.)

_By Poseidon_, even Keith and Pidge were giving him pity glances.

He rolled his eyes. "The nymphs probably accepted me so easily because of my eyes."

"Eyes?"

"They're attractive, don't you think?" Lance asked, smirking and look straight into his camera. His eyes met all of theirs. "Sensual."

"I guess," Pidge answered. They were pretty, like gemstones. Just a little more useful.

Hunk was not stunned, for years of being Lance's brother had desensitized him of direct looks. The fact he was watching through a screen only made it that much easier to ignore Lance's seduction. "Of course, brother," he humored him, not really understanding the question. "The hottest."

Shiro was a little stunned, mesmerized by his eyes, and less easier to coax out of his turmoil. "Don't do that," he scolded Lance immediately after. "What did you just do?"

Lance laughed.

Keith was blushing as well, but he looked down almost immediately. "I don't get it," he muttered, not feeling any different from the usual. They still heard him.

"You guys felt a little weird when looking at their bodies, right?"

"Well, duh," Hunk said. "They were naked."

"It wasn't just that," he told them. "Sure, anyone looks good when they don't have clothes on," he winked, "but their bodies and my eyes have the same effect. You guys were enamored, even if it was only for a second. They caught your attention, that's the point. It's like an extra +20 charisma, 100% critical hit!"

"What?" Keith and Shiro murmured under their breaths. Obviously, they had had terrible childhoods, thought Lance.

"Wait, hold up!" Hunk yelled, "Is that why you were always so popular back at the Garrison? Why weren't you as popular back home? Oh my god, I had a crush on you when I was a kid, that was your fault!?"

"Hunk, you're straight," Lance frowned.

"That's what I thought too!"

Pidge started laughing under her breath.

Keith grimaced. "You guys aren't—"

"Never," they said simultaneously.

"Sleeping with the family's a little gross," Lance continued. "Even if I was adopted, it didn't cross my mind that I was a healthy growing selkie until I was 13. And by then, I was too familiar with the neighbors. I considered them all my sisters and brothers and my aunts and uncles. Some did try, though," he added thoughtfully.

"I haven't had a crush on a dude in eight years, man," Hunk said. "It lasted a week. Besides, I already have a partner!"

"Is Shay even a girl, though?" Pidge wondered.

"That one holds my heart and it's all that matters," Hunk sighed into the mic.

Lance was glad the discussion was off him, at least...

**3**

Keith connected to Lance's visor line.

"_You never answered the question_," he said suddenly, making Lance jump in his seat. "_About children?_"

"Whoa. Keith? What's up." He listened for other voices. "Is this a private line?"

"_Yes_." He hesitated and said, "_I just wanted to know. Sorry, this was stupid, you don't have to tell me_."

"No, no," Lance wanted to shake his hands in front of him to prevent Keith from feeling weird about an admittedly weird topic, but he couldn't exactly release hold of the Blue Dolphin's controls. Besides, he couldn't see Keith. They were on mic only. "I can answer."

"_Really? I thought you wouldn't_," Keith said on the other line. Lance tried to read his voice, and really wished for the screen to pop up to show what kind of expression he was showing. "_Since you hate me and all_?"

"I don't think anybody believes that at this point," Lance said. "I don't hate you."

He blushed. Admitting it out loud was a lot more embarrassing than he thought it would be. "You," he stuttered, "you wanted to know about children..."

Oh, he could feel they were_ both_ embarrassed now! Keith remained silent on the other side, but Lance could almost picture him nodding.

_Like a band aid, Lance, like a band aid_, he thought in a mantra before shouting, "I don't need children to be happy, and-and-and I don't need to be with another selkie to be happy either!"

He disconnected immediately and slowed his dolphin to a stop, covering his burning face with both hands. The Blue Dolphin began to sink along as he sank into his seat. He may as well have told him "I love you, marry me please!"

"I don't _love _him!" he yelled at his dolphin.

The dolphin clicked dubiously.

"That was so embarrassing. Blue," he groaned and peeked from under his fingers to look as his dolphin's ceiling, "please take me to the oversea and leave me to drown."

The dolphin clicked at him disapprovingly.

"_Lance?_" Shiro's mic sounded, and his screen popped up in front of him. "_Are you okay? Your dolphin stopped moving._"

"I'm fine, Shiro," he waved him off. "I'll catch up in a sec."

"_Okay. You sure?_" When he nodded, Shiro looked at another screen to give a knowing look. "_See, he says he's fine, Keith._"

"_DON'T_—"

The line disconnected.

"Urgh," Lance groaned into his hands again. "I just _really _like him!"

This time, Blue clicked compassionately.

**Short story sized, but pack full of love. I should have edited this more.**


End file.
